The Insta-Mailbag

(A Filthy Lie cross-posted from IMAO)

Like Michelle Malkin, Glenn Reynolds gets his fair share of venomous missives from unbalanced readers.

Unlike Michelle Malkin, surprisingly few of them are crude slurs about being a woman or a minority. Most of it is revolves around a perceived dearth of Instalanching, like this typical example:

"Why won't you link me??? Why don't you answer my e-mails??? After all the cool links I've sent you, you OWE ME!!! I HATE YOU!!! You're a stink-butt poopy-head, that's what you are!!!

Your #1 Fan,
Frank J.

PS You can make it up to me by linking this cool post I did on the Semite menace."

Aside from the "where's my link?" theme, however, the rest of his mail tends to fall into one of the several categories listed below:

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Korean restaurants complaining that the last meat shipment tasted more like Labradoodle than Shih Tzu, despite what the shipping manifest said.

Cease & Desist orders from the Precious Moments people regarding his line of "Satanic Moments" figurines - especially that "Hobo, Bloody Hobo", which is particularly nastly.

PeTA (People Eating Tasty Animals) berating Glenn for drinking animals, which is just sick and inhumane.

Long, obscenity-laced screeds from angry mothers who bought Glenn's adult movie "Tramp of the Penguins" by mistake.

The American Nudist Association trying to talk Glenn into joining their "Best of Blogging" organization: "Sleeping Naked Media".

Rejection letters from Fox saying they're STILL not interested in producing his show "So You Think You Can Robot Dance".

University of Tennessee frat boys sending death threats for selling them fake Spanish Fly. Usually containing the line "You said these were spurious. They didn't spur her on at all!".

E-mails addressed to "Professor Reynolds" wanting to know if he ever nailed Ginger while he was stuck on that island.

Or Gilligan.

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Of course, the most common category is requests for tips on how to punch Frank J.

Usually from Laurence Simon.

Posted by: Harvey at 07:09 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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