(A Precision Guided Humor Assignment cross-posted from IMAO)

Everyone knows that if you're facing an almost-certain death sentence, the best way to avoid it is by writing a children's book to soften your image, just like Stanley "Tookie" Williams did.

Ok, that's a bad example.

But still, a tome for the wee ones IS the only ticket to freedom for a vicious killer. Without one, he's guaranteed a ride in Old Sparky. Just look at what happened to O.J.

Ok, that wasn't a good example either.

The point is that you can soon expect to hear about what a wonderful guy Saddam is once his bibliography hits the New York Times.

What's that? You didn't know Saddam wrote children's books?

Of course he did. Here's just a small sampling of his works:

* Tyranny for Tots

* Curious George Invades Iraq

* One Fish, Two Fish, Dead Fish, JOOOOOOO! Fish

* Mommy Bakes Yellowcake

* Uday and Qusay Take a Bullet

* I Can Detonate My Own Vest!

* Horton Hears a Wahabbi

* Hide and Seek, Marco Polo, and Blind Man's Bluff: The Rainy Day Book of Fun U.N. Games

* Amelia Bedelia Beheads a Hostage

* Hassan Potter and the Half-Blood Infidel

* Little Camel Fluffy Toes and the Murderous Americans

* Are You There, Allah? It's Me, Fatima

* Little House on the Sand Dune

* My First Honor Killing

* Charlie and the Chemical Weapons Factory

* "Is That An IED?": An Explodey the Mouse Story

* The Tyrant, The Weasels, and the Warmonger

* The Poky Little Puppy and Other Unclean Animals

* Green Eggs and Hamas

Don't call me with them, though. Those cowards at the NSA might be listening in.

Posted by: Harvey at 07:45 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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