Blogdaughter Boudicca's real-life sister Morrigan gives a reason that she can't blog:

As far as blogging goes, I am just not a writer. I wish I were, I really do because I have ridiculous things happen to me. I did meet some great people in Tennessee and hopefully I'll tag along again. I will continue my skulking about the blogosphere envious of all the talented writers.

She just strung four coherant sentences together into a paragraph, and - in the process - effortlessly incorporated two metaphors: "tag along" and "skulking about the blogosphere".

I've written plenty of posts where I didn't even manage that.

Mo... seriously... if you can leave a comment, you can blog. I hate to drag out the big guns, but here it goes:

My first month as a blogger.

Notice how most of my posts are basically just comments on other people's posts. Nary an original thought to be found. Just proving my point: if you can leave a comment, you can blog.

"But my writing sucks!"... Well, EVERYONE sucks when they start out.

Everyone.

Here's Instapundit's first post:

Well, it looks like the Department of Justice is finally going after the music industry for antitrust violations. Expect more of this kind of thing in the future, and not just with regard to the music sector, but with regard to all entertainment industries. Here's how it shakes out from the Bush Administration's viewpoint: First, the entertainment industry genuinely breaks the law: there's lots of payola and other anticompetitive practices, as extensively documented in Salon over the past several months. Second, it's unpopular with two groups of voters Bush needs: old people, who don't like its products, and young people, who don't like the industry because of its stands over things like Napster, DVDs, and so on. Third, it gives lots of money to Democrats, and its leaders spend a lot of time bashing Bush.

The question is, how sophisticated will the Bush administration's assault be? With care, the administration could launch an assault that would split artists from studios and labels, further dividing and demoralizing a major source of Democratic support -- and maybe even splitting off some people who will decide they like the Republicans after all. Is Bush that smart? Is Ashcroft? Is Karl Rove? Stay tuned.

Boringest thing I ever read in my life. That's how HE started. Now he's on top of the world.

Then there's Frank J. of IMAO, who writes DAMN funny original content, now that he has about 3000 posts under his belt. But look at this post from his first day of blogging:

The U.S. Army is now making computer games for free download. The military was always the only part of the federal government I didn't mind my tax money going to because they kill evil foreigners, but now I get video games out of the deal. Kick ass!

Two sentences of commentary on a news story. That's it. Now he gets 8000 hits a day and he's got two books in the works.

Oh, and the great Straight White Eric? Here's his day one (his blog sucked so bad the permalinks didn't even work. You have to scroll to the bottom of the page for this):

ok..ok...ok.....so, I set up a brand spanking new blog, and the FIRST thing the wife says is..."that is crap, you need a new title for it..".....SHEEESH!!....some people just CAN'T be satisfied....oh well..the debate is still out...maybe she's right...but do you think that I'D admit she is?...hmmm...just have to wait and see, I suppose....anyway, I'm off in search of a great Robert Service poem to post on here...stay tuned...for those of you who don't know of Mr. Service's work, lets just say this...he was in the Yukon WAY before Goretex was invented...enough said...

There isn't even a LINK in that post.

So here's the truth about blogging - everyone's got 10 sucky posts inside of them. Underneath them are brilliant shiny diamonds of breathtaking literature. But the ONLY way to get at the diamonds is to start shoveling out the suck. You HAVE to be willing to be really bad before you can be any good.

Put the pride aside, play the fool for a bit, and let yourself become something more beautiful than you can currently imagine. Every rose that one day turns its face to the sunshine started as a seed laying face down in the dirt.

Let yourself blossom.

Posted by: Harvey at 07:53 AM | Comments (20) | Add Comment
Post contains 757 words, total size 5 kb.

1 Mo - start the blog but don't tell anyone about it. See how it feels after a month or so.

Posted by: _Jon at February 14, 2006 08:50 AM (uHRYR)

2 Dang. Most of my posts still look like those examples...and I've been trying to do this for over a year...

Posted by: Ogre at February 14, 2006 09:02 AM (/k+l4)

3 "...if you can leave a comment, you can blog..." Amen, brother!

Posted by: pam at February 14, 2006 09:03 AM (l6NIn)

4 Hey, I like to think I have 10,000 sucky posts I can write. I'm only on 300 something.

Posted by: Contagion at February 14, 2006 09:22 AM (Q5WxB)

5 From the woman who made C's in English and still has bad grammer... you can post. ;-)

Posted by: vw bug at February 14, 2006 12:28 PM (NyrfU)

6 Do you mean I'll actually have a good post at some future time? Excellent... So far I have over 800 sucky posts, guess that means eventually I have millions of good ones.

Posted by: Teresa at February 14, 2006 03:17 PM (FZwDL)

7 Harvey, thanks for not pickin' on me. Most all of mine suck, if you're awake. I kept readin' comments at Vman's, and JmyFlynny kept makin' great comments, IMHO, and I started buggin' her to start one. She doesn't update much, but she finally did start one. Morrigan, ju can doit! Just don't trust Harvey. Blog rule #1, never trust Harvey... he's bad money, and a bad bad example. Just ask him. He's got more blog offspring then Blogger does. He should've named his joint Johnny Appleseed, hell, he, or some part of him is every where, and just remember Morrigan, if you ever need a laugh, when you're feelin' down, and thinkin' you can't do it, just come on over to my place, if that don't change your mind, you're not awake like I said above...

Posted by: RedNeck at February 14, 2006 04:52 PM (tSJ8V)

8 ... hey, man... my first post?... it sucked?.... bite me....

Posted by: Eric at February 14, 2006 07:30 PM (r5XsL)

9 I still suck.

Posted by: GaMongrel at February 14, 2006 07:45 PM (tYXgL)

10 heh... I started out slowing then fizzled out altogether! Eric, you are an ellipsoidal ignoranus!

Posted by: Madfish Willie at February 14, 2006 07:58 PM (D2pBz)

11 slowly.... fucking spell checker can't read my mind!

Posted by: Madfish Willie at February 14, 2006 07:59 PM (D2pBz)

12 vw bug... has bad grammar, and also can't spell hehehe

Posted by: Shadoglare at February 15, 2006 07:26 AM (Vz9/T)

13 Been doing it for a couple of years now, and there might be 10 shiny examples of decent posts out of the 1000 or so that I have written. I do it for me, almost as a stress reliever. Not quite as much fun as duct-taping my children to the trunk of the car, but it keeps me out of jail.

Posted by: Richard at February 15, 2006 11:05 AM (/ypef)

14 *sigh* I think I shall continue being the voyeur. At the point that I feel like I can perform, I will be well prepared and ready for the show.

Posted by: Morrigan at February 15, 2006 09:05 PM (35+yA)

15 Mo - voy away, but keep this in mind: there's NEVER a good time to start a blog. There's always other things you could be doing. You just need to jump in and start swimming. Learn as you go. Because you'll never be 100% ready to step into the unknown. Meanwhile, keep commenting, it's good practice :-)

Posted by: Harvey at February 15, 2006 09:24 PM (ubhj8)

16 I'm still waiting not to suck at blogging, I don't know that I really have a talent for it somehow.

Posted by: Amanda at February 16, 2006 04:22 PM (L4Sch)

17 ... you know, Harv... sometimes people just like to watch... there isn't anything wrong with that.... ... Mo, you can do as you please... I'm just glad you are hanging around and reading...

Posted by: Eric at February 16, 2006 06:17 PM (r5XsL)

18 Eric - you don't need to lecture *me* on the pleasures of "just watching" ;-)

Posted by: Harvey at February 16, 2006 08:41 PM (ubhj8)

19 Eric, Harvey, y'all quit fightin' over the woman and play nice now... You gotta do what you gotta do. If you want to just "chime in" that works, but somethin' tells me she could pull bloggin' off as an after thought.

Posted by: RedNeck at February 16, 2006 09:58 PM (tSJ8V)

20 HEY! MY FIRST BEGINNINGS AT BLOGGING WERE GREAT AND YOU EVEN WROTE ABOUT IT. NOW THEY SUCK BUT THEY DIDN'T IN THE BEGINNING AND NEITHER WAS 'ABOUT ME." YOU WERE ACTUALLY QUITE AMAZED. REMEMBER??? I SUCK NOW CAUSE I'M NOT DOING MY JOB; SURE I CAN KEEP UP WITH THE NEWS IF I WANTED TO; SURE I COULD TALK ABOUT TERROR. I COULD ALSO DISCUSS EVERY OTHER DAILY THING BUT I'M THINKING OF GOING INTO STORYBLOGGING AND STUFF LIKE THAT. I HAVE TO SET UP A COMFY PLACE TO TYPE. IT'S JUST THAT I'VE GOTTEN SO SICK LATELY THAT I'VE LOST MY TOUCH. I'M HOPING IT'LL BE BACK SOON ENOUGH BUT I AM BOUNCING BACK AND FORTH AT WHAT I REALLY WANT TO DO AND WHAT I WANT TO SAY. BUT IN THE BEGINNING, I DIDN'T SUCK AT ALL, HARVEY. HUGS CINDY AAFFLLAACCKK

Posted by: firstbrokenangel at February 16, 2006 10:55 PM (jHRvj)

Hide Comments | Add Comment