(Introduction)

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[(rubber stamp - {picture of eagle} WHERESGEORGE.COM)]

After being rebuffed by their first choice of Kentucky Fried Chicken, Alfred Hitchcock Productions settled for teaming up with the popular currency-tracking website to promote the re-release of their 1963 hit movie.

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(Introduction)

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[Doritos]

At least Dan Quayle spelled this one right.

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(Introduction)

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[Congratulations Gary! April 26, 1992 Elkhart Lake [Road] America]

Obviously it wasn't the prize money that made people want to race on the Road America track as it was the chance to be able to say, "I own the fastest tricycle in Wisconsin!"

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(Introduction)

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[(rubber stamp: GUN OWNER$)]

Charleton Heston:

Legendary Actor - Gun Owner - Lousy Tipper.

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(Introduction)

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[macho up side down (plus stylin' stick figure guy)]

As a follow up to the popular State Quarters program, the Treasury release the first in its new series of "Xtreme Sports Dollars", featuring "Mad Skillz Snowboard Dude".

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(Introduction)

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[have a nice day]

As a follow up to the popular State Quarters program, the Treasury released the first in its new series of "Customer Service Cliche Dollars". Coming soon: "How may I help you?" and "Fries with that?".

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(Introduction)

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[conditioner]

Question: what item does Don King always forget to put on his shopping list?

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(Introduction)

Yes, son, I did say that you could get your ear pierced, but I didn't say that you could get a hole big enough to stick a freakin' baseball bat through!

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(Introduction)

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[Todd is]

Although he might not be, depending on whether you go with the Clinton definition.

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(Introduction)

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[stress related]

As a follow up to the popular State Quarters program, the Treasury released the first in its new series of "What Caused That Heart Attack Dollars".

Coming soon: "Chicago snow-shovelling" and "NAG! NAG! NAG!"

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(Introduction)

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[Merry Xmas Jeff & Carol]

It was Jeff & Carol's best Christmas ever! Imagine FINALLY being able to afford those Happy Meals they'd had their eyes on for so very long!

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(Introduction)

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[VAULT]

"Brian, your scarecrow's pathetic!"

(GOD how I love that commercial!)

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(Introduction)

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[Jennie Withrow Prod CPR]

As a follow-up to it's popular State Quarters program, the Treasury issued the first in its new series of "Life Saving Medical Technique Dollars". This one commemorates Jennie Withrow's ground-breaking experiments with the use of cattle prods to resuscitate heart-attack victims.

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(Introduction)

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[EASTER 2004 Love You Gramma]

Having just spent $50 on chocolate bunnies and jelly beans, Gramma rewarded the grandkids' underwhelming show of gratitude by cutting the little bastards out of her will.

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(Introduction)

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[Disney Vacation Fund]

After years of scrimping and saving, the Joneses had finally scraped together enough money to buy the gas to drive around the parking lot long enough to find an open stall.

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(Introduction)

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[bass-turd {picture of fish, arrow pointing to small object under tail}]

It's some kind of commemorative dollar, but I'm not sure whether it's for Ted Kennedy, Bill Clinton, or Michael Moore.

(hat tip to Susie of Practical Penumbra for finding this one for me)

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"As a follow-up to the popular State Quarters Program, the US Treasury will, in 2007, start producing it's new series of "Presidential Dollar Coins". First up - George Washington."

No, seriously.

Four per year, and - depending on who gets elected when and who dies when - this will take somewhere between 10 and 12 years. A president will only be placed on the coin if he's been dead two years as of his scheduled minting date. That's because the US does not allow living people to be depicted on its money, since that's what crappy third-world dictatorships do.

And British colonies, too, I suppose, so no offense intended to the current loyal subjects of QEII.

Oddly, they'll still be minting Sacagawea $1 coins right alongside the presidential ones. My guess is that it's a sop to the teen-mother vote.

In other coin news, come 2009 (the bicentennial of Lincoln's birth) they'll be screwing with the back of the penny. Four different scenes from Lincoln's life:

1. his birth and early childhood in Kentucky
2. his formative years in Indiana
3. his professional life in Illinois
4. his presidency in Washington, D.C.

In 2010, the back of the penny will feature, "an image emblematic of President Lincoln's preservation of the United States of America as a single and united country". Probably a rebel getting bayonetted or something.

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(Introduction)

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[(crossed out) FIGHT CRIME. KILL A LIBERAL]

As a follow-up to the popular State Quarters program, the Treasury announced the first in its new series of "Democrats-in-Charge Forbidden Speech Dollars". Coming soon: (crossed out) "Support the 2nd Amendment" and (crossed out) "Nancy Pelosi Looks Like a Post-op Michael Jackson"

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(Introduction)

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[Bob 54]

... is the nickname applied to Senator Dole after he was FINALLY elected President in 2048.

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(Introduction)

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[GUN OWNER $]

I hear that back in her stripper days, Ann Coulter used to find a LOT of these tucked into her G-string.

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