(Introduction)

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[(Lincoln with two-tone moustache & glasses)]

"Fine! The truth is I was sniffing red & black magic markers when my meth lab exploded! Now can we PLEASE talk about something else?"

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(Introduction)
[new note, not previously posted]

(click to enlarge)

[(lipstick on portrait)]

Meanwhile, George is thinking, "...lower..."

[Hat tip to Susie of Practical Penumbra for finding this one for me]

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(Introduction)

As a follow-up to its popular State Quarters program, the Treasury released this portrait of Frank Zappa as the first in its new series of "Artists You've Heard Of But Never Listened To Dollars". Coming soon: "Marilyn Manson" and "Garth Brooks".

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(Introduction)

Oh, so you think it's FUNNY to feed jalapenos to my Chihuahua?

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(Introduction)

[(two peace signs)]

If you let a chicken use your "Dance Dance Revolution" dance pad, make sure she wipes her feet first.

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(Introduction)

"This watch was on you daddy's wrist when he was shot down over Hanoi. He was captured and put in a Vietnamese prison camp. He knew that if the gooks ever saw the watch, they'd confiscate it--take it away. The way your dad looked at it, this watch was your birthright. He'd be damned if any slope's gonna put their greasy yellow hands on his boy's birthright. So, he hid it, in one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years he wore this watch . . . up his ass. Then, he died of dysentery, he give me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable hunk of metal up my ass two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you."

"Oh, and he told me to give you this dollar, too."

Posted by: Harvey at 04:20 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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1 So, that's why you never put money in your mouth....

Posted by: Madfish Willie at November 22, 2005 04:27 PM (KNARx)

2 I never realized how much your voice sounds like Christopher Walken's until today...

Posted by: Susie at November 23, 2005 07:47 AM (a0oF7)

3 uh.... yeah... That explains A LOT.

Posted by: Contagion at November 23, 2005 08:13 AM (e8b4J)

4 It looks like that bill has made a few rounds through a few strippers G-strings.

Posted by: Dr. Phat Tony at November 23, 2005 10:41 AM (fk/lm)

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(Introduction)

(click to enlarge)

[(drawing of Cap'n Crunch hat on Washington)]

Johnny Depp stars in "Cap'n Crunch: Curse of the Black Crunchberry"

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(Introduction)

(click to enlarge)

Charlie & the Chocolate Factory: The Director's Cut - Bonus Material: See Ringo Starr's screen test as he tries out for the part of Violet Beauregarde.

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(Introduction)

[new bill, not previously posted]

(click to enlarge)

[(unmarked 100 Franc bill with image of topless woman)]

French Historical Fun Fact: In 1789, France invented the wardrobe malfuntion.

[Hat tip to Snopes and blogdaughter Michele of Letters From New York City]

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(click to enlarge)

After working as a teller for a couple years, I actually started paying attention to all the paper that my fingers were flailing over. At first, my eyes were only caught by the out-of-the-ordinary bills, ones with blue or red Treasury seals, or interesting patterns to the serial numbers. I imagine most people get hooked on collecting paper money that way.

But the idea of trying to get "one of everything" didn't interest me. In the meantime, though, I became fascinated with the bills that were REALLY different. What I call graffiti currency.

These are bills that have been written on, drawn on, rubber-stamped, or otherwise imbued with the mark of one of their temporary owners. My collection also includes bills that are mangled, degraded, or mutilated, whether deliberately or through the vagaries of circulation.

In short, my collection is an attempt to answer the question that no one ever asks: "What's the worst looking bill anyone's ever brought into your bank?"

I posted that about 30 months ago as part of my very first blog entry. And it's taken a while, but I've made it through the entire collection. Since I'm no longer working for the bank, I'm not likely to be adding anything new except on rare occasions, although reader submissions are always welcome.

Meanwhile, since I doubt anyone has viewed the entire Graffiti Currency archives, it's probably safe to start recycling the pictures - possibly the captions, too, depending on the vagaries of my muse.

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(click to enlarge)

[Mockingbird Hill 'The Alternative' HWY 115 & 60]

Just down the road from the old Munster place.

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(click to enlarge)

[83]

Answer to the question: "What is the average number of factual errors in a typical New York Times article?"

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[St Jude pray for us]

As a follow-up to its popular State Quarters program, the Treasury released the first in its new series of "Rejected Beatles Lyrics Dollars". Coming soon: "Lucy in the sky on acid", and "All you need is love and a sturdy condom".

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(click to enlarge)

[1992 2810 2087]

[After choosing the $200 answer under the category "Significant Numbers" on Jeopardy]

"What are 'the number of tears cried by Nancy Pelosi, Ted Kennedy, and Howard Dean, respectively, over not being able to get an indictment against Karl Rove?'"

[Hat tip to bloggranddaughter Sarah The Penguin of Because We Have Thumbs for finding this one for me]

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Answering e-mail from Nigerians.

Giving credit card numbers to telemarketers.

Taking candy from strangers.

Answering the telephone with "My parents aren't home right now. I'm here by myself".

Opening executable files attached to e-mails.

Posting pictures of themselves in their underwear on the internet.

Writing their first and last name on a dollar bill and spending it.

(see first comment at the link)

(see also this blog's tagline)

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(click to enlarge)

[St. Lazurus! Anyone who receives this will win a lot of money if they re-write this on 10 bills]

Hmmm... wonder what would happen if I wrote this on 10 boobies?

Posted by: Harvey at 08:20 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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