(Introduction)

2) What was Bart's collie dog's name?

3) In the year 2000, the Springfield Tire Yard celebrated what anniversary of its fire?

4) Who is Mr. Burn's rival at the Shelbyville Nuclear Power Plant?

Official Trivia Card answers in the comments tomorrow.

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(Introduction)

If you can't giggle, tickle, scream, laugh, run around the room naked, pour liqueur on each other and lick it off, tie each other down, have whipped cream fights, and dance and sing with each other, then you are having sex with the person too soon.

(CAUTION: Romantics beware - comments may contain naughtiness)

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(Introduction)

(click to enlarge)

[(big green spot on Washington's face)]

Martha sighed... she didn't mind so much that George wore her dresses once in a while, she just wished he'd take it easy with her green eye shadow.

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(Introduction)

2) Which band played at Marge and Homer's senior prom?

3) What kind of beer does Homer drink when he visits the Happy Sumo restaurant?

4) Bart gets hit by what year and make of car?

Official Trivia Card answers in the comments tomorrow.

Posted by: Harvey at 05:53 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Blogson Wandering Gunslinger of Gunpowder Grotto asks for guesses as to the meaning of the word "Zwitter". Apparently the title of some incomprehensible song or another by Rammstein.

My guess: A miniature high voltage fly swatter. The full-size version is called the "Zwatter", a combination of "zap" and "swatter". They changed the name for the new, smaller version - the letter "i" makes it sound diminutive.

Any other guesses?

Posted by: Harvey at 05:40 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Because I like presents. Here's what I got, by category:

BLUE THINGS:

An anonymous donor sent me some animated gifs. A couple are blue. Work safe, but hard to explain.

Lynn of A Sweet, Familiar Dissonance got me some blue music and something blue to look at while I'm listening to it.

Blogdaughter Boudicca of Boudicca's Voice got me a new car, and some scenic blue hills to go with it.

Bloggranddaughter Mrs_Who of House of Zathras got me a nice blue beverage holder.

Beloved Wife TNT of Smiling Dynamite got me something dreadful and horrible from Blue Mountain Arts (work safe, but turn down your speakers - there's music) as well as posting a picture of me hard at work on my computer.

Bloggranddaughter VW Bug of One Happy Dog Speaks offers a bonanza of blueness, including - but not limited to - some clean underwear and a birthday meat thermometer call.

Blogdaughter Tammi of Tammi's World got me the dreaded Blue Screen of Death. I'll be poking CTRL+ALT+DEL for a while.

Susie of Practical Penumbra sent me a copy of the new movie "The Blair Cupcake Project" (it features a blue candle, so it counts) as well as some amazing cleavage.

Bloggreatgranddaughter Tink of Tink's Tribulations got me a little vacation - blue sky, blue water... blue beer...

RSM of When the Smoke Clears gave me a reminder of my Navy days.

Blogdaughter Oddybobo of Boboblogger gave me this mysterious item, but it seems to include helpful instructions in the lower right corner.

Blogson Wandering Gunslinger of Gunpowder Grotto got me a couple of fancy readin' books, even though readin's fer sissies. I'll give him credit for mentioning the theme, even if this one's more of a stretch than a Fruit of the Loom waistband.

Blogdaughter Teresa of Technicalities gave me all kinds of pricey blue things, plus a way to pay for it all.

Blogdaughter Machelle of Quality Weenie offers me 4 boobies with plenty of blue.

Bloggranddaughter ArmyWifeToddlerMom took me to a live taping of Celebrity Jeopardy, which features that soothing blue background.

Tiffany of Blown Fuse got me the carbonite-frozen body of that little bastard who dumped my smuggled shipment of spice out the airlock.

Richmond of One for the Road (who also gave me birthday hugs, since she picked the right night to order pizza) offers me so many things to unwrap that I just don't know where to start.

Still-inexplicably-blogless reader Morrigan says the two magic words: "Vegas, baby."

Bloggreatgranddaughter Tink of From Chaos to Serendipity has 3 near-misses, but gets it right on the 4th try.

Pam of Pamibe offers a little blue something. Judging by her rolled-up eyes, it looks like she's already roofied, so that'll save me a little trouble.

Blogson Mike the Marine of From The Halls To The Shores found some graffiti currency for me.

Rachel of Pereiraville has the most literal interpretation of the theme I could imagine.

Leslie of Leslie's Omnibus also went literal, but I admit that I had to click the explanatory link before I got it. Kudos to her for making the connection I should've made myself. So obvious in retrospect.

Bloodspite of Technography gave me some blue camel toe and made sure I'd have the strength to put it to good use.

Steve of Steve the Pirate hits the blue trifecta with sky, surf, and sweater kittens

Beth of She Who Will Be Obeyed makes me think that large floral patterns might not be such a bad thing after all.

John of Argghhh! got me something that might look good on my wall.

UPDATE 4PM: Blogson Joey of... well, he's currently between blogs, but he keeps promising to be back on line "any day now"... sent me this quaint little song. Bluest lyrics I've ever seen.

OTHER THINGS:

Blake of Laughing Wolf welcomes me to the club.

Wes of Bohdran (Drum) Roll, Please, realizes something about glass houses and stone-throwing. Meanwhile he also shared a delightful quote:

Going to war without the French is like going deer hunting without your accordian." -- ret. Gen. Norman Swartzkoff

Blogson Contagion of Miasmatic Review got me not a damn thing, but I really like the Muppets, so I'm stealing that and calling it my birthday present.

HAPPY THOUGHTS:

Blogdaughter Michele of Letters From New York City:

Men only get more distinguished and sexier with age!

and a poem:

This lousy child didn't forget.
This lousy child is sick in bed.
Will need to get you something blue
but still don't know what give you

Blogson That 1 Guy of Drunken Wisdom:

You'll get nothing and like it.

Apparently blogless reader Tennessee Budd:

as the Humongous said of Wez, "You puppy." Happy 40th; fair winds & following seas.

Blogson Peter of Shakey Pete's Shootin' Shack:

If you'd have stayed in the Navy you'd be ready for a pension now.

Spacemonkey of The Flying Spacemonkey Chronicles:

Sorry dude, you're old.

Blogless reader Shimauma:

many thanks to your parents for bringing you into existance; I'm certain they enjoyed every second of it

Apparently blogless (and possibly Hare Krishna) reader Ktel60:

(adjusts finger cymbals)
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday,
Birthday Birthday
Happy Happy,
(repeats ad naseum)
(is firmly ejected from the airport)

Maeve of Bartender! Another round...:

I feel your pain.

Graumagus of Frizzen Sparks:

I'm pretty sure I could get a stripper to wear some woad paint if TNT will let you come out and play...

Pixy Misa of Ambient Irony:

40 is officially not old any more

WARM WISHES:

Anna of A Rose By Any Other Name

JimmyB of The Conservative UAW Guy

Straight White Eric

Army of Mom

Bloggranddaughter Rave of Quid Nunc

Damian G. of Conservathink

Apparently blogless reader Russ

UPDATE 10:30AM AFSister of My Side of the Puddle

And thank you all for celebrating with me.

Posted by: Harvey at 08:45 AM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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Bloggranddaughter Mrs_Who of House of Zathras is having a birthday. Heard she likes back rubs, so I got her a fancy-ass massage chair:

It looks pretty complicated, so I thought I should hire someone to operate it for her.

This guy looks like he'd be pretty handy around the house:

I'm sure Mrs_Who will find ways to keep him busy.

Happy Birthday, sweetie.

Posted by: Harvey at 06:00 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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1 Can you book him ahead for my next birthday, Harv? I've got some *ahem* chores for him....

Posted by: Susie at September 18, 2006 10:12 AM (I8uqK)

2 Woohoo! Thanks, Harvey! He sure looks like he can crawl an attic - he even has his own ladder! That blasted oven vent ought to be a cinch to finish now. I might warn him to at least put on a shirt - that fiberglass can be awful. Hmmm... Nah. HEY, wait a minute! That's *MY BEER* he's pulling out of MY refrigerator! OUT! OUT!!

Posted by: =HC= at September 18, 2006 11:51 AM (NfSVQ)

3 Harvey, you are just the bestest grandpappy a girl could ever want! When I came home, the curtain rod was up and the oven vent was in place! And a nice massage chair on top of all that??? Couldn't get better! ...and =HC=, after all of the 'gentleman's' hard work, he can have a beer...or even two!

Posted by: Mrs_Who at September 18, 2006 02:49 PM (NfSVQ)

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(Introduction)

If I received a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.

(CAUTION: Romantics beware - comments may contain naughtiness)

Posted by: Harvey at 05:57 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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(Introduction)

(click to enlarge)

[FROM KHRISTA MILLER FUCK YOU BITCH]

Dear Grandma,

Just wanted to thank you for the thoughtful birthday gift.

Love,
Khrista

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(Introduction)

2) In "Bart of Darkness", what does Bart break?

3) Who presents the barbershop quartet, the Be Sharps, with their Grammy?

4) In "Bart the Genius", what special new school is Bart sent to?

Official Trivia Card answers in the comments tomorrow.

Posted by: Harvey at 05:53 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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(Introduction)

Warm like a summer's breeze

Soft as a night's whisper

Deep as the bluest sea

The fullness of love

Unbound and free

Shine on me in the night

With starlit glow

And mellow my day with your desires

That in my step I am light and free

And in my sleep I am content

And at rest...

(CAUTION: Romantics beware - comments may contain naughtiness)

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(Introduction)

(click to enlarge)

[Did you know? Steve and Guido are lovers! But Steve is the man!]

Guido's wife stared at the dollar, thunderstruck... the new drapes, the sudden interest in show tunes, the chronic incontinence... it all made sense now.

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(Introduction)

2) When Marge becomes a cop, she arrests Homer for taking her what?

3) Who is the Shelbyville version of Bart?

4) When Bart sells his soul, what does he buy with the money?

Official Trivia Card answers in the comments tomorrow.

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(Introduction)

Oh my sweet darling! For a moment I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Now I see that I am very much alive and heaven has been brought to me.

(CAUTION: Romantics beware - comments may contain naughtiness)

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(Introduction)

(click to enlarge)

[CT CT (also drawing on Washington's face)]

As a follow-up to its popular "State Quarters" program, the Treasury instituted the "State Dollars" program. Here we see Connecticut's design, celebrating its claim to fame as the birthplace of Grandpa Munster.

[[hat tip to Susie of Practical Penumbra for finding this one for me]]

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(Introduction)

2) Who falls in love with the new girl, Samantha Stanky?

3) Homer's half-brother Herb regains his fortune by inventing a machine that does what?

4) Who directed the musical "Streetcar", which featured Marge as Blanche?

Official Trivia Card answers in the comments tomorrow.

Posted by: Harvey at 02:22 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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TNT & I are packing & tossing the clutter in the estate house while the weather's still nice, so my weekend's a little busier than expected.

Add that to the more-or-less literally millions of thoughtful folks stopping by to wish me happy birthday, and it looks like the round-up will be delayed a bit. Right now I'm eyeballing Monday as looking promising. Might be sooner. Keep watching.

And thank you for the outpouring of love and/or abuse.

Posted by: Harvey at 02:33 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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(Introduction)

If a star fell from the heavens every second I spend thinking of you, then the sky would be barren in a half a day's span.

(CAUTION: Romantics beware - comments may contain naughtiness)

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(Introduction)

(click to enlarge)

[Abel]

"Look," said Cain, "SOMEBODY has to be the world's first murder victim, and your name got drawn fair and square, so stop squirming!"

[[hat tip to Susie of Practical Penumbra for finding this one for me]]

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(Introduction)

2) When Homer is trying to think un-sexy thoughts, he imagines who in a bikini?

3) In "Homerpalooza", Lisa says the outdoor concert smells like what?

4) In "Homerpalooza", who's been left at the veterinarians for a very long time?

Official Trivia Card answers in the comments tomorrow.

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