Going out of town for a couple days. Internet access not expected. Probably start posting again Tuesday.
In order to enforce my usual strict decency code in the comments, I'll be using my stealthy watch-cat Amber to guard the premises.
Remember, Amber could be anywhere.
And she's watching...
Posted by: VW Bug at October 29, 2005 06:57 AM (9PYn2)
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Hey Amber, Harv left loads of laundry in this closet for you.
MerowW!
*Closes closet door behind cat and nails door shut*
One watch-kitty down, 1 party to go...
Posted by: GaMongrel at October 29, 2005 07:33 AM (Zx59s)
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GaMongrel, you can't just lock Amber in the closet like that. She might suffocate.
*Drill* *Drill* *Drill*
There, now she's got some air holes.
Plus that fits in with the whole swiss cheese motif that they've got up there in Wisconsin.
Posted by: GEBIV at October 29, 2005 09:18 AM (3H8d8)
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Don't worry about the cat, I've got some traps to take care of her... you want her alive? Well hell, that takes all the fun out of trying to launch her from the mortar.
I know harvey has some good cigars around here somewhere. Where he hides them I don't know... Would it be wrong of me to use a sledge hammer to help me look for them?
Posted by: Contagion at October 29, 2005 10:06 AM (rlZ+q)
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*sneaks in with whipped cream shaped into a pumpkin*
OOOO! Party!
Posted by: oddybobo at October 29, 2005 10:07 AM (776v3)
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I saw the coolest video of a cat being chopped up in a airplane engine. Wonder if I can find it and show it to Amber?
Ohhhh and here is 100 bags of M&Ms.
Posted by: VW Bug at October 29, 2005 10:38 AM (9PYn2)
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Does anyone remember where Harv keeps the good booze?
Posted by: GEBIV at October 29, 2005 12:04 PM (3H8d8)
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No need to worry about that, GEBIV. I gots me 3, count 'em, THREE kegs. One with rum, one with whiskey, and the other's got a mix of half-Miller, half-Bud. I didn't know what you guys like. Now let's party like it's that one year everyone always wants to party like!
Posted by: Gunlord at October 29, 2005 12:21 PM (0GsIj)
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Hey everyone, I brought my Bob Newhart DVDs!!
Shall we?
Posted by: Chuck at October 29, 2005 12:47 PM (JXgKx)
Posted by: Madfish Willie at October 29, 2005 01:08 PM (E8bLs)
Posted by: DixieDarlin' at October 29, 2005 02:27 PM (oHNtt)
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Hi Bob!
*takes a drink*
Posted by: GaMongrel at October 29, 2005 03:29 PM (Zx59s)
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Hey! Watch that flying pussy
cat! Is it declawed yet?
Posted by: GaMongrel at October 29, 2005 03:31 PM (Zx59s)
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I've always wanted to shave someone's pussy cat. Here Amber, Amber...
Posted by: GaMongrel at October 29, 2005 03:32 PM (Zx59s)
Posted by: Madfish Willie at October 29, 2005 04:19 PM (E8bLs)
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Hey guys, *takes a sip of rum* why does Madfish Willie keep saying poo...*looks down at his shoes*...aww crap.
Posted by: Gunlord at October 29, 2005 06:25 PM (6nts2)
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I made it with the car full of pumpkins. Where should I put them?
Posted by: VW Bug at October 29, 2005 06:49 PM (9PYn2)
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And here is a pooper scooper. And I've called the Cleaning Men to come clean it up. Hmmmm. Where is Machelle when you need her?
Posted by: VW Bug at October 29, 2005 06:56 PM (9PYn2)
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Thank you VB. Now, A QUEST TO FIND OUT WHERE THAT POOP CAME FROM! TALLY HOOOO!!! Ohh, pumpkins! Wait a minute. It's Halloween, so where's my costume? What am I going to be again? Ohh yeah. TO MEN'S WEARHOUSE AND THAT MUSIC STORE!
Posted by: Gunlord at October 29, 2005 09:36 PM (6nts2)
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Costumes? No one said anything about costumes.
Posted by: GEBIV at October 30, 2005 06:16 AM (3H8d8)
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Why is there a shrine to Michael Gross in his basement as well as pictures of him in compromising positions?
Posted by: Contagion at October 30, 2005 07:23 AM (rlZ+q)
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*Gunlord bursts through the door, wearing a white suit with a pink button shirt underneath and a saxaphone slung on his shoulder* I'M BACK! So, who can guess who I'm dressed as?
Posted by: Gunlord at October 30, 2005 08:30 AM (6nts2)
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Hey! Good morning! I'm a bit late for the party but I brought doughnuts! And milk for the kittty. Here kitty, kitty, kitty......
Posted by: Richmond at October 30, 2005 08:44 AM (e8QFP)
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Any beer left in Harvey's fridge?
Posted by: William Teach at October 30, 2005 09:03 AM (eSZb/)
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Gunlord, you're Bill Clinton on vacation?
Posted by: GEBIV at October 30, 2005 11:30 AM (3H8d8)
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Yep, beer in the fridge. There is some alcohol in the bar... anyone have the key?
Posted by: VW Bug at October 30, 2005 12:41 PM (9PYn2)
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Bill Cli...I'M MIDVALLEY THE HORNFREAK! *notices everyone's blank stares* What? You guys never read that Japanese comic book Trigun?
Posted by: Gunlord at October 30, 2005 02:13 PM (6nts2)
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*Knock, knock,* I'll get it!! *opens door*
OH. MY. GOD.!!!! John Kerry's here in
his costume!!!
Posted by: DixieDarlin' at October 30, 2005 03:57 PM (oHNtt)
Posted by: Madfish Willie at October 30, 2005 04:26 PM (9bTJQ)
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Poor Amber!
I'm taking her home with me, away from you maniacs. Harvey, I think you need a much bigger cat to handle this crowd... or maybe a really big spider. Think I'll leave my tarantula to watch 'em.
http://haloscan.com/tb/dustbunny101/112781522580325339
(Okay, he's not really mine, he's from the zoo).
Posted by: dustbunny101 at October 30, 2005 04:36 PM (a+Mxr)
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Oh JEEZ! I hate spiders!! Squish it! Squish it!!! ::hides behind the bar::
Posted by: Richmond at October 30, 2005 04:53 PM (e8QFP)
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Alright, don't worry Richmond, we're going to see what this here bad boy can do! *Takes out the saxaphone and starts playing like crazy (with varying degrees of quality). The spider begins to vibrate then explodes* YAY! IT WORKED! I CAN KILL THINGS BY PLAYING MY SA-OWWW! *One of the dead spider's fangs suddenly hits Gunlord in the cheek* CRAPCRAPCRAPCRAPCRAPCRAPCRAPCRAP!!!!!
Posted by: Gunlord at October 30, 2005 05:29 PM (6nts2)
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Hey, why did it separate the words "in", "the", and "cheek" like that?
Posted by: Gunlord at October 30, 2005 05:31 PM (6nts2)
Posted by: Madfish Willie at October 30, 2005 06:50 PM (9bTJQ)
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Ahem . . . I found some interesting costumes in Smiling Dynamite's closet!
Ladies and Gentlemen!
. . . here we have VW in a french maids costume . . .
. . . here we have Dixie Darling in a naughty school girl costume . . .
. . . here we have Richmond dressed as a naughty police woman . . .
. . . and I'm wearing Madonna's Like a Virgin Costume. . .
wait! Contagion, take that off! I don't think it's a costume!
Posted by: oddybobo at October 31, 2005 08:36 AM (6Gm0j)
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okay guys, I've got a ball of string, ten rolls of duct tape, 5,000 paper clips, 25 magnifying glasses, 15 spools of copper wire, whatever's just lying around Harvey's house, and my trusty swiss army knife. Who has requests?
*Assembles a delicious sandwhich out of common ingredients found in Harvey's kitchen while he waits*
Posted by: MacGyver at October 31, 2005 09:43 AM (43HDF)
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How bout a trusty tricorder that gets free pr0n?
Posted by: GaMongrel at October 31, 2005 02:22 PM (k6jVK)
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pssssssssssssssss.... [flush]
Posted by: Madfish Willie at October 31, 2005 03:44 PM (9bTJQ)
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Okay MacGyver, let's see what I can come up with. Well, the magnifying glasses make me want to build some kind of torture device where we have the glasses over certain parts of the body, then we shine light on them to make them magnify and cause very painful burns...On second thought, forget that I said anything.
How about this; we all take turns putting a large strip of duct tape on our leg, then we yank it off as fast as we can. The person who screams the less or the most manly gets...something.
Okay, here we go. Everyone uses the stuff to try and make a sword. Then we have a swordfighting competition. The last 4 people standing get to leave, and everyone under them gets to explain to Harvey what happened to his house.
There. I'm out of ideas. Now it's your guys' turns.
Posted by: Gunlord at October 31, 2005 05:05 PM (6nts2)
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Well, if you had some chewing gum, I could make a nuclear reactor for you. But all that other stuff is just useless without the gum.
Posted by: GEBIV at October 31, 2005 05:14 PM (BkzMG)
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Hey, I brought a few kegs of homebrew! Anyone up for some... hey, I own that very same Like A Virgin costume. I wonder if this one fits...
Posted by: physics geek at October 31, 2005 05:44 PM (auFn9)
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No, i rather agree with the glasses idea Gunlord. Oh and by the way thanks for that long and lengthy email explaining how everything is my fault. It's made me depressed as hell what with your life being ruined and all while you seem as happy as anything. Thanks a lot.
Posted by: Cat at October 31, 2005 06:48 PM (4zpdi)
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No. It's not possible. How did you find me? *Deep breath* Look Cat, I'm sorry about that thing I wrote. Trust me, I was really having a bad day. I came home to find my mother sitting on her bed crying her eyes out going on for hours how she did not know where she went wrong and that since she failed me so badly she was going to kill herself. You know, I was really afraid that my mom was going to comit suicide. The anger at everything that was going on swelled up inside me, and I lashed out at the first thing that I could think of. Namely, you.
I have been trying to be secret about everything that I do (remember, I still have parental controls on this computer). In fact, I don't even know if my mom DOESN'T know about this. It could be that she's just keeping her mouth shut, waiting for me to say the one wrong thing.
Look, what I did to you, was not good. If you think that I am nothing but a heart-breaking monster, I don't blame you. If you must know, I've already, "dealt", with myself in terms of what I did to you.
If you think that you could ever forgive me, go ahead. You'd be the first.
Gunlord
Posted by: Gunlord at October 31, 2005 08:10 PM (6nts2)
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thank god! i thought you hated me and wanted me dead. I'm sorry Charlie. Is there any way you can add me to msn again? I promise i wont send anymore emails. Not one.
Posted by: Cat at October 31, 2005 08:17 PM (4zpdi)
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No. Because of the parental controls, all communications inside of MSN need to be approved by my mother. And, judging from history, that would either result in me being sealed off from the electronic world, or mom commiting suicide through auto asphyxiation. She's got some sort of obsession with killing yourself that way.
Posted by: Gunlord at October 31, 2005 08:31 PM (6nts2)
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woah... wait a minute what do you mean by ""dealt" with myself"?! Add me to msn right now! If im blocked from your account or something i set up another email alpha-beta-charlie-delta@hotmail.co.uk. I wanna know that you're alright now. You mean everything to me.
Cat xxx
Posted by: Cat at October 31, 2005 08:35 PM (4zpdi)
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then cant you get AIM or something?
Posted by: Cat at October 31, 2005 08:37 PM (4zpdi)
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1.Doing AIM.
2.The "uk" part of the e-mail address would be a dead give away.
3. How did you find me?
4. Tim hates my guts (based on that post he did of me). Are you sure he won't mind you talking to a "terrorist", as he calls people who aren't afraid of guns?
Posted by: Gunlord at October 31, 2005 08:47 PM (6nts2)
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1. Yay! My AIM is fullof3vil
2. Good point
3. Google (been looking for you since you buggered off)
4. Don't care
Posted by: Cat at October 31, 2005 08:52 PM (4zpdi)
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P.S. I did a Google search, and in case you're wondering, the Gunlord from livejounal isn't me. cough*copycat*cough
Posted by: Gunlord at October 31, 2005 08:52 PM (6nts2)
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lol I didn't look in livejournal.
Posted by: Cat at October 31, 2005 08:54 PM (4zpdi)
Posted by: Cat at October 31, 2005 09:02 PM (4zpdi)
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Sorry to interrupt you Cat and Gunlord but I found a leotard in Harvey's sock drawer.
*puts it on*
Woohoo, I'm dirty dancing!
Posted by: SeanS at November 01, 2005 06:43 AM (cEjQ0)
54
You're dirty dancing because Harv didn't wash that leotard since the last comment party. Those whip-cream stains are very you though...
Posted by: GEBIV at November 01, 2005 07:31 AM (SW6Yt)
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