Although second-born of the Bad Example Family, _Jon of We Swear was actually the first conceived. Which is to say, he's the first person I told to get a blog who wound up getting one eventually. Between start & finish, (the now mysteriously missing) Bartender of Madfish Willie's Cyber Saloon joined the blogosphere with an easy push.

What you're not going to know about _Jon just from reading his blog is, well, just about everything. At least if you only read his blog up until the Reunion started. Before hitting Orlando, he came across as the strong, silent type. He didn't post a whole lot, and what he did post was fairly thoughtful and serious.

Then I met him in person, and what a surprise.

The first thing that struck me about him was how smart he was. I get a general sense of someone's intelligence by how articulate they are when speaking extemporaneously. _Jon is flat-out scary. When most people discuss a subject, they'll say a few words, pause to collect their thoughts, talk a little more, and so on. _Jon can hold forth on a subject, start to finish, like he's reading from a polished script, and he never even so much as pauses to search for the right word.

Lightning-quick doesn't begin to describe it.

And heaven help you if he unleashes his wit in your direction. You're gonna get got, but good. And no matter how snarky the comment, you just have to laugh at being gotten because the things he comes up with are just that funny.

In a way, I feel sorry for him, because - in order to find something REALLY funny - it has to catch you by surprise, at least to some degree. With the way _Jon's mind works, I can't imagine that much catches him by surprise. His existence (at least at work) is probably a living hell of watching people state the painfully obvious and thinking they just cracked the most brilliant funny ever.

Poor _Jon.

But at the Reunion, he laughed more in a week than he has, I'm sure, in years. Good, honest, belly-laughs. And it makes you feel really good to be able to catch him like that, because polite laughter isn't in his repertoire.

The second thing is that he swears. A lot. And artfully. Some people say that cursing is a sign of a weak vocabulary. Truth is, sometimes f*** (or a string of them) is EXACTLY the right word to express an idea or emotion. _Jon is a master at this, and - since he possesses the impeccable timing of a professional stand-up comedian - you end up laughing rather than being offended, even if you're not normally appreciative of Anglo-Saxonisms.

Beloved Wife (aka TNT of Smiling Dynamite) is now using f*** as an adjective on a regular basis. Geez, you shoulda heard her at the airport when we were leaving. Between the time _Jon dropped us off and the time we boarded the plane, she probably dropped about a dozen f-bombs. Which is about how many she's dropped in the previous 20+ years I've known her.

But before you get the idea that he's just a slightly-less-green-and-furry version of Oscar the Grouch, be aware that he does have his soft & sentimental side. When it happens, it leaves you a little edgy, because you're waiting for the sarcasm shoe to drop, but then it doesn't, and you realize you've seen little _Jonny Teddy Bear wearing his emotions on his sleeve, and it leaves you a little misty, every time.

For example, when we were having dinner with Frank J., _Jon remarked about how the circle had finally closed, because I originally dug _Jon out of Frank's comments because of a poem he'd written about 9/11, and now we were all sitting in the same room, face to face - something that was unimaginable in the beginning.

The moment was completely lost on Frank, I'm sure, since he was there more to make SarahK happy than any other reason. But I understood exactly what _Jon meant, and, just like when I first read his poem, my soul resonated to the harmony from a kindred spirit.

Since the Reunion ended, _Jon's been a little more lighthearted, is posting more, and is generally having more fun, blogwise. It's a wonderful change, because now everyone else can see glimpses of what I saw when I met him in person. You folks should consider yourselves lucky, and if you ever get a chance to experience the whole package in person, don't pass it up.

Oh, and I got a chance to see something that very few people have seen and lived to tell about. At one point, Johnny-Oh of Closet Extremist zapped him with a verbal shot that left him completely silent. Not even a "F*** you!" in response.

For which Johnny-Oh will eventually be killed, run through wood-chipper, and fed to hogs, but was still beautiful for being a once-in-a-lifetime shot. It was kind of a "had to be there" thing which doesn't translate well into text, but I was awe-struck at the time.

Anyway, _Jon has his version of events over at his place. And don't believe that "great leader" crap. That's just his way of comparing me to Hitler :-P

And just for _Jon: Fuckity Fuck Fuck Fuck!

There. I said it :-)

Posted by: Harvey at 09:18 PM | Comments (13) | Add Comment
Post contains 913 words, total size 6 kb.

1 I love _Jon. Period.

Posted by: Bou at February 28, 2005 09:35 PM (z7nbM)

2 Despite the whole "Brunswick" incident, I've described _Jon to my Non-blog friends as "The big brother I didn't know I needed". Just seeing the look of shock on his face when I made my snappy rejoinder (especially due to the fact that he had just articulated his ire at anyone who makes such a slur) was absolutely priceless! Absolutely a Prince of a Man, and if he'll provide air fare, I'd be proud to help him move.

Posted by: Johnny - Oh at February 28, 2005 11:27 PM (6XYy1)

3 _Jon is great. I think he needed the family reunion as much as Tammi did. *grin* In any case it seems to have led him toward making some good changes lately. Yay! I think he'll be the happier for it. And the fact that Johnny_Oh still walks the earth... okay I gotta admit I'm still laughing about that.

Posted by: Teresa at February 28, 2005 11:37 PM (nAfYo)

4 Wasn't it _Jon who invented the naughty Love Note comments?

Posted by: Sally at March 01, 2005 03:46 AM (pBBIC)

5 Again - one of my favorite people in life. His wit, his heart, his brilliance. Yeah - I am so very lucky to count him as my friend. Again Harvey - one of those few times I cannot add a thing - great job! You captured his person perfectly!

Posted by: Tammi at March 01, 2005 07:58 AM (HaRi0)

6 _Jon is just wonderful, brilliant, astonishing, talented, and so many more adjectives! I just wish I had had more time to spend with him and had more sleep so I could talk more than 3 word sentences!

Posted by: vw bug at March 01, 2005 08:40 AM (J3ZdR)

7 Thank you bLog daddy, and siblings. A couple of comments on your post; He said 'package'. heh. heh heh. Hogs don't like their meals going through a shredder, and they don't need it. They eat the bones and everything. And every time someone brings the topic up only makes the (eventual) revenge sweeter. As for TNT swearing - well, that's not the only thing I taught her while we were down there... :evil grin: Having Frank and Sarah there was important to me for the reasons I told them there. One of which you recapped. Yeah, you are correct that the whole picture of me does not get revealed in the blog. And that's intentional. The more personal stuff is there partly because of the familiarity I've gained from meeting most of my bLog family, and partly from the stress cracks of Real Life. When things settle down here, I'll pro'lly be more focused on what I wanna say. There is no way for me to get across the timing and flow of what I'm trying to say. Lots of people say things like; "I didn't know you had such a sense of humor." Good. It's a special part of me I share only with people I care about. The rest of the world can go fuck itself. Regarding "Great Leader", so "Harvey = Hitler" is fake but accurate? Most thanks go to Tammi for setting all this up. She's the heroine here (as in 'the drug that flows through my veins and makes me crazy'). Ooops, wrong horoin... The best part of being there was being with such good people. It brought the good, happy person out of me. Normally he stays pretty buried. The _Jon you saw there was a reflection of yourselves, really. --- Oh, and Johnny - every time you eat bacon now, just keep in mind that someday - someday, that's gonna be you. :shakes fist:

Posted by: _Jon at March 01, 2005 09:05 AM (RZ4Hy)

8 heh....he said "they eat bones"...heh heh

Posted by: Tammi at March 01, 2005 10:11 AM (HaRi0)

9 I like _jon "irregardless" of his potty mouth. ;-)

Posted by: Pam at March 01, 2005 12:53 PM (8oDTM)

10 _Jon - New tagline for your blog: We Swear - Figuratively. Literally. Irregardlessly.

Posted by: Harvey at March 01, 2005 12:58 PM (tJfh1)

11 Sally - yes, the corruption of the Love Notes was all about _Jon.

Posted by: Harvey at March 01, 2005 05:13 PM (ubhj8)

12 Sounds like you guys had a nice little circle jerk... were you the pivot man or what... thanks for the fucking invite, dickhead... I spoo my goo on you and your circle of jerks!

Posted by: Mudfish Billy at March 02, 2005 06:30 PM (MEfjQ)

13 Hey Bartender! 'Bout fuckin' time you got back into town. I'm guessing you just now made bail in Neillsville? http://dbigback.blogspot.com/2005/03/warning-sick-material.html

Posted by: Harvey at March 02, 2005 06:48 PM (ubhj8)

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