As a child, changing your mind is easy. "I'll have grape soda... No... Coke... NO... Mountain Dew".

As an adult it becomes harder. Beliefs are propped up by stone pillars of selected evidence, and that which does not fit the structure is not considered, much like drapes that don't match the carpet.

Yet sometimes, through either wisdom or circumstance, one is forced to re-examine the truths that give structure to one's life. The results are either a strengthened belief in what one already stands for, or a seismic shift that collapses the belief-temple, requiring you to pick up the pieces and start anew to construct something newer and better that's worth believing in.

These are never easy times, but the caring and support of loved ones can ease the transition.

It's harder when it was the loss of loved ones that caused the collapse in the first place.

It's harder yet, when the loved ones who remain give you, not support, but contempt and ridicule.

There is no greater loneliness.

Via the Showcase, I came across Michele of Letters From New York City, who is going through such a time right now. Previously a liberal/democrat, she lost dear ones in the 9/11 attacks, and she has come to question everything she previously believed. Now she has made her decision:

The truth is I can no longer remain subdued in my arguments, just as I cannot temper my level of disgust with the DNC. I am at the point of revulsion. I can no longer debate like a lady. I simply want to take my gloves off, get into the ring and throw a few well placed punches of my own. I can no longer stand by silently and know that brave Americans are being accused of untruths and vile things. I can no longer live with that lie silently.

Now if I were a member of one of those organizations, what would I do? I would probably say something like, "I'm sorry to see you go Michele. I liked you as a person and a member. I'm disappointed that we can no longer see eye-to-eye on some important issues. But, even though I can't agree with what you're doing, I still wish you the best of luck in the future."

What was actually posted in her comments lacked even this chill warmth, let alone even the tiniest shred of class or dignity.

I swear, I never thought people this crass and unfeeling actually existed outside of poorly portrayed movie villains.

I know better now.

And I feel slightly dirtier for the knowledge.

To cleanse myself, I'm asking that anyone with decency and a soul stop by Michele's place and welcome a brave woman who's just taken a tremendous leap of faith and landed solidly on her feet.

Show her that it really is better over here.

UPDATE 6-29-04 6pm: Michele's blog was hijacked recently. She was able to rescue the content, but not the comments (either the cruel or the supportive). I changed the links in this entry to point to Michelle's post at its new site. You'll just have to take my word that the comments were harsh, thoughtless, and vindictive.

Posted by: Harvey at 11:35 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 549 words, total size 3 kb.

1 Thanks for posting this Harvey. Some People really Piss Me Off!! Day in and day out, I find I am still amazed at the cruelty of some (not to mention the ignorance). What a great site she has! Another to add to my daily read. Thanks again for "introducing" us.

Posted by: Tammi at June 26, 2004 06:57 AM (HUcSS)

2 Thank you for your kind and thoughful words. Your support is greatly appreciated. Yes, I too was surprised at the lack of respect in their comments. But I guess, having their student government funds frozen until they accounted for overspending [on anti-war protests really ticked them off]. Have you noticed how there hasn't been any anti-war rallies in nyc since April. Hmmmm, I wonder why? Again, thank you for the support, it now feels less lonely in that hallway. - Michele

Posted by: Michele at June 26, 2004 10:37 AM (beN4P)

3 Done! I was glad to see how many of your blog friends and family have gone over there to show their support. Made me proud to be your blog daughter, Harvey!

Posted by: Boudicca at June 26, 2004 12:49 PM (aTpvK)

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