March 27, 2007
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[Andy Wasilewski, P.O. Box 5121, B'ham, WA 98227]
Part of me says "mail it back to him".
Part of me says "sign him up for a subscription to Playgirl".
Posted by: Harvey at
07:26 AM
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Post contains 31 words, total size 1 kb.
Here's how it goes.
The answer is a (more or less) completely innocent word.
The hints, however, are designed to make you think of something... not so innocent.
I'll put the first hint in the main post, and the other two in the extended entry.
Good luck.
1) You pay me to play with your rocks
(see extended entry for more clues)
more...
Posted by: Harvey at
07:24 AM
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Post contains 90 words, total size 1 kb.
March 26, 2007
"the Iraqi Police in this area are stepping up to that challenge more and more every day"
When we started waving at passing motorists and pedestrians as we drove by in our up-armored humveeÂ’s, people looked confused and unsure what we were doing. Now, we wave and smile and get waves and smiles in return.
Iraqis are turning in insurgents, calling when they see IEDs and even chasing away bad guys in some cases.
The best part is seeing the Iraqis take charge of situations in the area. From IED discoveries to crowd control to providing security for pilgrims moving through the area, the Iraqi Army and Police are performing more and more of those tasks with less involvement from Coalition Forces.
I want to tell the story of Iraq as it is, not as I want it to be. It would mostly be good news, though, because that is what is mostly going on: infrastructure projects, new schools and medical clinics, humanitarian programs, security operations, etc.
Yup. I think it's pretty obvious from reading this that we've lost the war, lost the peace and need to pull out ASAP.
I mean, it just looks so BLEAK, and there's simply nothing to be optimistic about.
[Hat tip: Radioactive Liberty]
[Pic via 21st Century Paladin]
Posted by: Harvey at
02:42 PM
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Although Former Florida Governor Jeb Bush was snubbed by the University of Florida for an honorary degree, he was still granted the immensely-less-impressive honor of being named an "honorary alumnus". Here are some of the other prestigious accolades he's been awarded:
* The Nobel Pathetic Prize.
* Honorary Chicago Bears 2007 Superbowl Quarterback.
* Losers Anonymous Lifetime Achievement Award.
* The Jason Alexander "No, Really, I'm More Than Just Seinfeld's Fluffer" Trophy.
* Best Actor for the movie "299".
* The "Seriously, You Don't Look a DAMN thing like George H.W. - Is Michael Moore Your Real Father?" Certificate of Questionable Parentage.
* Honorary Robin from the Justice League of America.
* The Nobel Pathetic Prize.
* Rowdy Frat Boys of America Puke-litzer.
* Boy Scouts of America "Whizzing Out The Campfire" Merit Badge
* Girl Scouts of America "Cookie Queen" Sash
* The Dan Rather "Integrity In Broadcasting" Ribbon.
* The Harvey, RightWingDuck, Cadet Happy, Spacemonkey, Laurence Simon, SarahK, and Aquaman Medallion of Overshadowed Excellence.
* The Congressional Medal of Whatever
Well, as long as he doesn't get the Ted Kennedy Driver's School Diploma, he's all right in my book.
Posted by: Harvey at
09:02 AM
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Iran now claims that the British Sailors and Marines that it took hostage a few days ago have confessed to invading Iranian territorial waters. Well, assuming this is true - and what possible reason could we have to doubt the Iranians? - you HAVE to wonder what excuse the British government will come up with for being there.
I speculate thusly:
* There was a lot of heavy betting on the camel races and they didn't trust their bookie to pay off.
* Trying to unload a shipment of genuine, licensed, "300"-logo burkas.
* Ship's mascot - Fluffy the Cat - needed a litterbox refill.
* Took Carter's advice on how to get a free 444 day vacation.
* Iraq, Iran... you can't catch EVERY typo.
* Helpless to steer away from the seductive, siren-like song of Iranian saber-rattling.
* Tweaking the Iranians noses by showing them what an unsunk Navy looks like.
* Came to deliver humanitarian aid in five megaton increments.
* They simply drifted off course because the ship's navigator was distracted by a piquant cup of Earl Grey.
* Investigating the connection between global warming and camel flatulence.
* Thought there was a big tent sale going on and wanted to take advantage of the low, low prices.
* Responding to Grail-shaped beacon
* Just comin' by to Rock the Casbah, baby!
* Falkland flashbacks. Please disregard.
* Bush said "just give us an excuse". What were we SUPPOSED to do? He paid in crumpets for God's sake!
* Wanted to borrow a cup of crazy from Ahmadinejad.
And whatever you do, don't add your own speculation in the comments.
Wouldn't want to risk inflaming the "Arab Street" ya know.
Posted by: Harvey at
08:42 AM
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Are we a mismatched pair? And how! But consider how different bees and flowers are, and how much better they make each other's lives.
(CAUTION: Romantics beware - comments may contain naughtiness)
Posted by: Harvey at
08:41 AM
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[COME BACK 2 ME 2/2/03]
Oddly enough, the Democratic Party's plans to bring the troops back to America actually predate the invasion of Iraq.
Posted by: Harvey at
08:40 AM
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Post contains 29 words, total size 1 kb.
Here's how it goes.
The answer is a (more or less) completely innocent word.
The hints, however, are designed to make you think of something... not so innocent.
I'll put the first hint in the main post, and the other two in the extended entry.
Good luck.
1) You get it on in the bedroom
(see extended entry for more clues)
more...
Posted by: Harvey at
08:38 AM
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Post contains 93 words, total size 1 kb.
March 25, 2007
"does anyone know where I can find atheltic socks with the colored stripes around the top, I would really like to have some more, the one's I have from middle school are really starting to yellow"
I scoffed as I Google-image searched, but it turns out that I had to go 11 pages deep to find any.
WTF?
Back in the day, ALL athletic socks came with three brightly-colored bands around the calves. Now it seems that unless you're some kind of estrogen-enhanced Christmas fetishist, you'll have to buy solid white and LIKE it.
I haven't felt this old since my nephew asked me "who's Monty Python?".
Posted by: Harvey at
10:55 AM
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"WTF!," I thought, "that sounds like something a liberal would do!"
So I Googled up one of the names he listed.
*Now* I understand.
On March 19, 2007, in Milwaukee, a bunch of "peace activists" [yes, the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinal actually called them that] vandalized an Army recruiting station.
Anyway, if you're an employer who's Google-checking candidates, and you're thinking of hiring any of the following people:
Kelsey M. Kazik, 20, Milwaukee;
Sara Keiza, 17, Milwaukee;
Jillian Duckwitz, 21, Milwaukee;
Richard A. Ketcham, 22, Milwaukee;
Amy M. Barger, 19, West Bend;
Jessica L. Brooks, 18, West Bend;
Craig R. Barringer, 20, Waukesha;
Jonathon W. Wilson, 17, Wauwatosa;
David W. Clerkin, 21, Madison;
Derek W. Johnson, 17, West Bend;
Nathan J. Bartelt, 20, West Bend;
Thomas P. Buckholt, 17, Milwaukee;
Jeffrey G. Lavato, 18, West Bend;
Andrew L. Ortlieb, 24, Milwaukee;
Kathryn E. Jacobs, 20, Milwaukee.
Be sure to ask them about their "extra-curricular activities".
By the way, these names were taken directly from the MJ-S article, so they're already out there. I just want to make sure that this continues to haunt them.
Remember folks, the only reason to be at an Army recruiting station is to join the Army. Those who want to treat it as nothing but a symbol - instead of having a little respect for the real men and women who are trying to do the VERY real job of protecting this country - should take their victory-subverting bullshit somewhere else.
Posted by: Harvey at
09:42 AM
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No pleading the Fifth, no jury trial... I confess... I love you.
(CAUTION: Romantics beware - comments may contain naughtiness)
Posted by: Harvey at
09:41 AM
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[WWW.TIPPLER.NET]
Just based on the name, I'm guessing that's Straight White Eric's secret blog.
Posted by: Harvey at
09:40 AM
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Post contains 23 words, total size 1 kb.
Here's how it goes.
The answer is a (more or less) completely innocent word.
The hints, however, are designed to make you think of something... not so innocent.
I'll put the first hint in the main post, and the other two in the extended entry.
Good luck.
1) I use my fingers to knock off a piece
(see extended entry for more clues)
more...
Posted by: Harvey at
09:39 AM
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Post contains 101 words, total size 1 kb.
(and ghost stories) March 24, 2007
It contained some real oddities and unusual parodies such as:1) a commercial for The Pubic Hair Club for Men
2) Fairytales From the Dark Side
3) a Bob Vila spoof where Bob and Norm spoke like they were from the hood
He's tried all the usual video sources and struck out. Can anyone point him in the right direction?
Posted by: Harvey at
08:45 AM
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Post contains 83 words, total size 1 kb.
Iranian naval vessels on Friday seized 15 British Sailors and Marines who had boarded a merchant ship to search for smugglers in Iraqi waters in the Persian Gulf.
It's being assumed that Iran will claim that it was because the British were operating in Iranian territorial waters, but there's been no official word yet. Which makes me wonder what reason they'll give when they finally speak up. Here are my best guesses as to the reason Iran will give for kidnapping 15 British Sailors & Marines:
* Thought that the hilariously quirky sketch comedy troupe they'd ordered from England had finally arrived.
* Mistook them for carbon offsets.
* Needed someone to explain that "cricket" thing.
* A simple request to borrow a cup of limes went horribly awry.
* Hoping to trade hostages for nude photos of Queen Elizabeth.
* Looking for helpful tips on how to get some islands back from Argentina.
* Seeking a diagnosis - is this parrot resting, stunned, or pining for the fjords?
* Just a little backsliding in their "don't kidnap the British" 12-step program.
* Desperately searching for insensitive pricks with British accents for reality-TV judging panels.
Ok, I don't know the real answer. All I know is that in 2500 years, they'll be making a movie called "15" featuring another 20,000 dead Persians.
Posted by: Harvey at
07:22 AM
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Post contains 235 words, total size 2 kb.
I adore the way your cheeks flush a slight, sunrise-pink after I kiss you.
(CAUTION: Romantics beware - comments may contain naughtiness)
Posted by: Harvey at
07:01 AM
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[(rubber stamp: GUNOWNERS$)]
Just amazing what a heaping pile of these have done for Rudy Guiliani
Posted by: Harvey at
06:59 AM
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Post contains 23 words, total size 1 kb.
Here's how it goes.
The answer is a (more or less) completely innocent word.
The hints, however, are designed to make you think of something... not so innocent.
I'll put the first hint in the main post, and the other two in the extended entry.
Good luck.
1) Chicks get laid here
(see extended entry for more clues)
2) I usually contain more than one pecker
3) A cock wants to come inside me
Answer in the comments tomorrow.
Posted by: Harvey at
06:58 AM
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Post contains 88 words, total size 1 kb.
March 23, 2007
I don't mind your messy morning hair. It reminds me of how it got that way last night.
(CAUTION: Romantics beware - comments may contain naughtiness)
Posted by: Harvey at
08:13 AM
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Post contains 37 words, total size 1 kb.
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[ABOSCO3@comcast.net]
Yes, it's true. If you're dumb enough to put your e-mail address on a dollar bill, it WILL be used to sign up at "hot amateur barnyard porn" sites.
Posted by: Harvey at
08:12 AM
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Post contains 39 words, total size 1 kb.
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