On occasion, I get people asking about some of the comments left by Madfish Willie. They'll say something like, "What's up with him? How come you let him troll your comments like that?"

Troll?

Hell, that ain't trolling, that's male bonding.

#1 guy rule - if someone you like says something rude, it's meant as a compliment. It's a way of saying "I think you're tough enough to take a verbal punch, and I think you're clever enough to give better right back."

Women, however, play a completely different game. With them (all too often) if you say something that can be taken as either completely innocent or mean & hurtful, they'll assume it's the mean & hurtful one (See rule #29).

And oh MY can they be acrobatic about extracting the wrong meaning.

Probably a habit formed over a lifetime of talking with other women, since when one woman says something ambiguous to another woman, she's usually getting in a cleverly-disguised little dig.

It's simply too unladylike to be mean in an upfront fashion, ya know. Gotta be catty about it.

On the other hand, maybe my mind's been poisoned from watching "Desperate Housewives".

Posted by: Harvey at 07:28 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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1 You've been watching Desperate Housewives? Doesn't that make you a woman?

Posted by: Contagion at December 27, 2005 08:18 AM (Q5WxB)

2 TNT watches it and she won't let me have the remote :-( THAT'S what makes me a woman :-D

Posted by: Harvey at December 27, 2005 08:25 AM (ubhj8)

3 See, this is why I have hardly any friends that are girls. They generally can't handle the abuse I constantly spew. Men seem to make better friends because they just say it how it is, and pick on you to your face instead of behind your back. You always know where you stand with a guy friend. Women, I just can't figure out. Funny because I am a woman!

Posted by: Sarah at December 27, 2005 11:29 AM (UKWHw)

4 Heh. You're SO going to love Contagion :-D

Posted by: Harvey at December 27, 2005 01:07 PM (ubhj8)

5 What's that supposed to mean you slack jawed hill billy?

Posted by: Contagion at December 27, 2005 02:34 PM (Q5WxB)

6 I watched part of Desperate Housewives once - I thought the writing was really good. I talk out loud when watching TV, usually predicting what the person should say. In many cases, they said what I have. Which is pretty rare. (Without the swearing, of course.) Contagion: that's pretty funny right 'der.

Posted by: _Jon at December 27, 2005 04:21 PM (/R7YK)

7 Didn't I get the same thing once from one of the broads here? And she thought that http://www.donotremove was some sort of dummy address?

Posted by: Phelps at December 30, 2005 10:58 AM (KAQTS)

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Blogson-in-law Alex of Alex in Wonderland is contemplating the meaning of the phrase "freedom of speech". Although in America it's usually discussed as a legal matter, he also makes note that - in a broader view - it's possible to have your freedom curtailed by peer pressure, even if it doesn't amount to a rights violation, per se.

Which brings me to the topic of how to voice objectionable opinions.

We all have opinions that other people wouldn't like, and we usually know it before speaking them. Yet sometimes the information is interesting or important. So what do you do?

My suggestion: stay calm, stick to facts, and limit yourself to a short, conclusory paragraph at the end, instead of interspersing the facts with copioius ranting invective.

For example, let's say that I'm disgusted by some things that certain black people are doing. I need to make it clear that it's motivated by hatred of stupidity, and not hatred of blacks in toto. I'd probably write something like this:

Or the MSM needs to speak up.

Because I haven't heard much about:

Louis Farrakan, who recently said "FEMA is too White to represent us and so is the Red Cross."

Or Kamau Kambon, who gave a speech a while back and said "We have to exterminate white people off the face of the planet" (audio clip of speech here)

By the way, did anyone else know that some free blacks actually owned slaves? I don't mean just buying family members, I'm talking about a plantationful.

Wonder how the reparations crowd plans to handle that?

Oh, and there's a tendency for "people of color" not to get prosecuted under "hate crime" laws.

And does anyone remember when the Neo-Nazis marched in Toledo against "black gang violence"... at which point black gang members violently rioted in the streets? Pegged the irony meter, it did.

What's my point?

Just saying that white people don't have a monopoly on stupidity, that's all.

And then dump the steaming pile in the comments at IMAO... say in someone's Filthy Lie Assignment.

Of course, if I did that, then SarahK would rewrite the comment to make me look foolish, my message would be completely lost, and my exercise of free speech in this case would be futile.

So I agree with Alex - don't be afraid speak your mind. However, DO keep your audience in mind and make your controversial points simply, clearly, factually, and (if possible) with supportive linkage.

Remember, if a free speech falls in a forest and no one sticks around to hear it, it doesn't actually make a sound.

Posted by: Harvey at 07:39 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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1 ... Or start your own blog and say whatever you want.

Posted by: _Jon at December 01, 2005 08:24 AM (g9Y9+)

2 This is the stupidest thing you've ever written! I demand you delete it now! Actually, I think everyone should just say what they think and feel. They just need to be preparred for the backlash of dissenting oppinion. IE this is your blog if you wanted to go off on how you feel that there is a huge double standard on what is considered racist and equal opportunity, go for it. If the MSM pick up on it and give out your address, you may get flooded with visitors that strongly disagree with you. Thus comments galore telling you that you are a moron. It's your freedom to spout off and it's thier freedom to respond.

Posted by: Contagion at December 01, 2005 09:19 AM (Q5WxB)

3 Well, I'm glad you linked to Alex's post because I only found out yesterday that Sally was contemplating giving up the blog. I need to email her because now I know why she's doing it. Blogging as free speech is a bit of a problem because morons will tend to respond to you either through comments or email and it's very difficult not to be hurt by their blatherings. Even if you do state things calmly and factually, there are often people who will go nuts over it. Then the delete key becomes your best friend. After all, as _Jon said - they can get their own blog and blather.

Posted by: Teresa at December 01, 2005 01:30 PM (FZwDL)

4 Oh no doubt you will get called a racist because you dared to go outside the political correct norm. But I have found that those who call me racist cannot refute the facts so they resort to words of insults to cover their inadaquacy of logic. Now, if I could yell insults loud enough to cover my inadequacy of spelling and typing

Posted by: GUYK at December 01, 2005 06:05 PM (hGIvu)

5 What's the fun of having a blog if you don't have people disagree? I love the occasional troll because I get the chance to slam on them with basic logic. Usually they will label me a Nazi and run.

Posted by: SeanS at December 02, 2005 12:57 AM (cEjQ0)

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